Friday, November 18, 2011

An Ode to Michigan According to Jeff Fox Worthy

  1. If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May, you may live in Michigan.
  2. If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't even work there, you may live in Michigan.
  3. If you've worn shorts and a jacket at the same time, you may live in Michigan.
  4. If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you may live in Michigan.
  5. If "vacation" means going anywhere North of Grand Rapids for the weekend, you may live in Michigan.
  6. If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Michigan.
  7. If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Michigan.
  8. If you have switched from heat to A/C in the same day and back again, you may live in Michigan.
  9. If you can drive 75 MPH through two feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you may live in Michigan.
  10. If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both doors unlocked, you may live in Michigan.
  11. If you carry jumpers in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Michigan.
  12. If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, you may live in Michigan.
  13. If the speed limit on the highway is 70 MPH and you're going 80 and everybody is passing you, you may live in Michigan.
  14. If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you may live in Michigan.
  15. If you know all four seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction, you may live in Michigan.
  16. If you have more miles on your snow blower than your car, you may live in Michigan.
  17. If you find 10 degrees "a little chilly", you may live in Michigan.
  18. If you actually understand these jokes, repost this so all of your Michigan friends and others can see, you definitely do live, or have lived, in Michigan.
I miss my Mitten

5 comments:

  1. Michigan has so much in common with Ontario, they are essentially the same place. The construction season joke is my fav.

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  2. My favorite was the Halloween joke. That was the only one that had me laugh out loud. My Halloween experiences were cold, rainy, or violently windy

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  3. Me too, once I went as a Gypsy when I was about eight, we had a freak snowstorm on Halloween and the only part of my costume that was visible was my red lipstick.
    This Halloween the kids who came to my door all seemed annoyed when I asked them what they were dressed as , because they had to unzip their coats.
    I also really liked your Shiraz post, but since I'm already in here commenting I thought I would just post it here. Drunk Blogging is where it's at! Keep up the good work.

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  4. You're like a friggin' ghost around here, Trishella! Thanks for reading my blog. I'm glad you appreciate my misadventures. I also need to tell you that getting a little buzz and writing is actually a good combo. I guess they tell us not to drink and write only so our true natural abilities come out without using something that's mind altering.

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