Wednesday, January 26, 2011

The Bitchy Waiter

The monotony of Facebook lead me to one comedic, witty, creative, hilarious, cute blond curly haired person all wrapped in one. He was the first thing I thought about when I woke up and the last thing I thought about before I went to sleep. Hell! I even dreamt about his ass. I don't blame myself though. I was drawn to him. He's hilarious. This man made me laugh so hard that I had tears running down my face. I was drawn to his writing. Our inner monologues are practically the same. He says the most out of the box things. His style of writing is by far the best I've had the privilege of reading in awhile. To me, that's a pretty damn good rank to be in as far as I'm concern. He is my favorite person on the internet. I swear we would be best friends forever if we knew each other in real life. I love his blogs! If you don't know who I'm talkin' about you must be living under a rock. The only person I could possibly be talking about is The Bitchy Waiter.

The Bitchy Waiter blog is exactly what it sounds like. He's a waiter that bitches about his job. I mean honestly, how many people out there do you know bitch about their job? That's right. Everybody. But he took his bitching to a whole new level by talking about how much he hates kids. Those blogs were always funny. He talked about practically every customer in his section: The good tippers, the cheap tippers, and the non-tippers. Celebrities he's served. And celebrities he has not served. He wrote about how people don't read the menu. Please Note, people: The menu is your friend. Even his co-workers and managers weren't safe. No one is exempt from getting written about. He's like the Perez Hilton of blogging. If you got on his bad side, you were the story of the day.

His cowardly critics would comment but only by being Anonymous. If Bitchy found an anonymous comment that really erked him, he would publicly address the anonymous critic by responding to them via blog. Bitchy didn't have any mercy. He would talk about that person so bad that their kids kids would know not to eff with him. He knows how to put his critics in their place. He talks about everything from their bad grammar, to their lack of intelligents, to their ignorance about the food service industry, and then wraps it all up with his closing argument.

One birth child of one Anonymous person comment lead to Frazzled But Happy Stay-at-Home Mom. On a previous blog My Child, My Pet someone commented "...Grow up, have a family, and post something worth reading..." Well, Bitchy being Bitchy, he took this persons advice and came up with Frazzled But Happy Stay-at-Home Mom just to prove a point. The point was: the Bitchy Waiter blog is about bitching. I don't understand why people can't comprehend that simple concept. 

The second birth child of another Anonymous comment creatived Dear, Anonymous. That was later transformed into A Comment on Comments. That was where Bitchy would comment on their comment to basically shut them up. I wouldn't dare go up against Bitchy. He's has no discretion when it comes to putting someone in their place.

A third birth child was born. His name was Dear, Bitchy Waiter. This was where his Followers could email him a question or concern regarding their job, personal life, or relationships. Bitchy would then create a blog to respond to the question or concern with the original question or concern included. But of course all of his advice wasn't all real. The Dear, Bitchy Waiter made mostly for comedic relief that included sarcasm and wit. I sometimes question whether the emails are real seeing as how Bitchy can morph into any character he wants to. Dude is talented.

Lipsy Gay is the forth character adopted by the bitchy waiter. Lipsy Gay is a fictional version of a former manager that talks with a gay lisp. Hence the name.

The Bitchy Waiter is a creative man. He's an actor, vocalist, and artist. He has his own jewelry line and merchandise. Recently one of his blogs was published in a magazine called The Printed Blog. He was also interviewed by a radio station in New York and in addition to that, he was interviewed by U.S. News and World Report in 2010. Is there anything this man can't do?

Alright y'all. I'm all Bitched out. Good Day.


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